Home Sweet Home

Imagine, if you will, living in a house you bought and paid for. You have worked hard, married, and raised your children in that house. To you, that is HOME. It doesn’t have to be big, it could be an apartment, never the less, it is yours. You have retired to enjoy the “golden years” and the remainder of your life. All of a sudden something as devastating as a stroke or accident leaves you unable to care for yourself. You recover in the hospital but further rehabilitation is required. You are transferred to a Rehab facility for up to three weeks of rehab, after which you fully expect to return home. But it is soon discovered that you cannot return home. Your spouse cannot care for your needs, you did not progress as the doctor would have hoped, or any number of reasons hinders your return. You are then transferred to the long term care wing and your new HOME, 200 N. Pine Ave, Jefferson Rehab and Health Facility, or any other long term care facility in your neighborhood. You are sharing a room with a perfect stranger. Your room is no bigger than a regular hospital room with a bed, television, and a night stand. You are allowed visitors, but this is not home, then again, it IS home.
They are called residents, not patients. Several reasons bring them here. Alzheimer’s disease, chronic illnesses, even old age. Whatever the reason they cannot care for themselves and family is not available, some 125 persons call 200 N. Pine Ave home. We all know or have known someone living in a nursing home but have we really LOOKED into their psyche regarding their new home? They may try to decorate to feel more at home but it is never the same. They get visitors but the grandchildren can never spend the night again. They cannot bake cookies, or even go fishing. They are being told, when, where, and what to eat, when to bathe, and what activities are available. Some are quite functional while others rely on someone for most of their activities of daily living. This may seem quite restricting and for some it is, but because of the care that is required this is often the best option.
I am volunteering at Jefferson Rehab as part of a field observation requirement for one of my Social Work classes. I have noticed the staff working with the residents with respect and care. They have activities scheduled for the residents and a Valentines Day Banquet was held for them. Most residents eat in the common dining room and they have made friends with one another. Once a month the facility sponsors a Pot Luck dinner and encourages family to bring dishes that are not usually served, ones the residents may be missing. This can bring bittersweet memories I would imagine. Sometimes it is easier to not be reminded of what you are missing. At other times, the memories are good.
Once again, the stereotype that older persons are set in their ways is dispelled. This is not the option that they may have picked for themselves, but it is where they are, and they are making the best of it. I realize other cultures, Asian and the Amish, for instance, would frown deeply at the thought of putting ones elderly family member in such a facility. The American culture sees no problem with it. As large a land space as the United States is, moving to other areas of the country is a very real possibility. And some would argue that we as Americans are very selfish, and do not want to be bothered with our elderly and ill family members. It is easier to place them in a home and pay the bill. One way of out of sight, out of mind. Until the day comes that family member is declining and you must face facts.
I would recommend when we are faced with this dilemma to research the facility extensively and make surprise visits. Do not be intimidated by the staff, that is YOUR family member, and you always want the best for them.

Winnie Mandela

Winnie Madikizela Mandela spoke at the Alys Stephens Center on March 8, 2010 as part of a trip to Alabama commemorating the 45th anniversary of Bloody Sunday, the march from Selma to Montgomery. She is the former wife of Nelson Mandela, who was imprisoned in South Africa for 27 years for sabotage. His arrest and conviction was part of his overall attempt to overthrow apartheid, apartness between races. I remember some of the violence reported on the newscasts during that era. I must admit I didn’t completely understand the reasoning behind the segregation or even why it had occurred. I remember the desegregation that occurred at my school when I began first grade and thought we were the last ones to take care of that problem. Obviously I was wrong. My history classes never got past the World War I so what I knew was from the news, which could be tainted. Ms. Mandela spoke very strong and clear. I was concerned that I would not be able to understand her accent but that was not the case. She seemed gracious and appreciative for the opportunity to visit Alabama once declaring the three words, Sweet Home Alabama. Alabama has so much history we need to tap into. It is amazing how much of it can parallel with history from other parts of the world such as South Africa. I am not for a second saying our racial history was as bad as South Africa, but in some ways it was and it was especially for the people in Alabama living it.

Diversity Avenue

Diversity Avenue Birmingham, AL 35215

I was raised and lived all of my life in a homogenous neighborhood. The diversity I experienced was at school or work. When I decided to continue and finally finish my degree, I wanted to attend UAB. I must say that Birmingham’s reputation, outside of Birmingham, is not favorable. All of my family and friends thought I was crazy for wanting to move here. My husband and I began looking for houses with three requirements, safety, price, and proximity to UAB. Ethnic make-up was never a factor. We found our house on 26th Ave NW in the Center Point/Pinson area. The neighborhood is old, from the late 50’s, the houses are brick, and the yards are mostly landscaped and neat. We felt good about the house and neighborhood and moved in last October to the most diversified street in Birmingham, if not America, both racially and generationally, which is extremely interesting. Our neighbors to our left are an African American nuclear family. Mom, Dad, pre-teen son, teenage daughter. When we were moving in they came by to welcome us to the neighborhood, and to make sure we were moving in and not just fixing up to rent out. Our neighbor to our right is a Caucasian, 81 year old widower. He came over as well, welcoming and confirming our intentions. Everyone seems much happier that we are actually living in the house and not renting it out. Across the street is a young African American male and next door to him are two middle-aged Caucasian females, elderly mother and her middle aged daughter. A few houses down is a Hispanic family with which I have seen at least three young children. Next door to them is another original member of the neighborhood. A Caucasian couple in their 80’s. We met him last weekend and he relayed the following about his Hispanic neighbor. Last summer, he was sick and his yard showed it. His Hispanic neighbor came over and maintained his yard, at no cost and continued to do so until the elderly man was well enough to take care of it himself. The Hispanic neighbor also gave the elderly man seeds from some peppers he commented on. The elderly man has a greenhouse and has them planted for the Hispanic man to put out into his garden when the weather clears.
The generational diversity and their acceptance of other ethnic groups have really surprised me. This is a generation who lived thru and may have participated in the civil rights era, yet both men seem open and accepting of all groups. This really shatters the stereotype that all of the elderly are racist and cannot accept change.
I moved to Birmingham with certain expectations, mostly with the idea that I would be isolated with a healthy fear. I had spent many weeks preparing myself for this. Yet, I have experienced a kind of “reverse” culture shock. I was expecting one extreme and found another. However, I realize that not all neighborhoods are as good as mine, the people in my neighborhood, people at UAB, even people on the street are nice. People wave, are courteous, and I believe I have made some friends for life here. It feels a lot like home. I can’t wait for spring and summer so I can meet more of my neighbors and get to know the ones I have already met better.

Safe Zone dialog

I attended the Safe Zone dialog meeting the week before spring break. I was not sure what exactly to expect as this was a required meeting. I would not have been surprised to see and hear some disrespectful behavior, from both sides. I realize a faculty facilitator was on hand to stop any problems that would arise but this was an open forum so that all views could be expressed freely. The panel could have exhibited an attitude of “in your face” with the questions. How dare we question their lifestyle? It is their life and we should accept them just as they accept us. The participants could have exhibited similar attitudes. Why do I have to spend my class time listening to this? Why don’t these people get over it and live like they are supposed to? Any number of questions and concerns could have been shared by both sides. However, I was grateful that both sides offered their stories and gave and accepted the criticism well. The dialog was informative and productive. Even at UAB, number 3 in diversity, these young people have experienced discrimination. It is really sad that our school has to offer “safe places” on campus. I would hope that any one would be safe anywhere on campus at any time.

Jewish Food Fair

I attended the Temple Emanu-El Food Fair on March 7. This is a Jewish Synagogue, a culture and belief system I have always had an interest in. I went into this event with several pre-conceived notions regarding the Jewish faith and food. The easiest notion to explain is that I have always thought of Jewish food as abundant and rich, both proved correct. We decided to try the Noodle Kugel and Quajado. Each is considered a side dish, however, between both of these, we could not have eaten another bite. Full plates were offered with meats, side dishes, and breads. We witnessed such a plate, you know the “go boxes” from restaurants? The big ones? The top could not fully close, and food was dripping out of the sides! The meats consisted of Corned Beef, Chicken, and Roasted Brisket. Ok back to the food we did eat. The Noodle Kugel is a type of pasta pudding. It looked like lasagna, layered noodles with a sweet sauce and crumb topping. The Quajado is a spinach, pasta, three cheese quiche type casserole, without the pie crust. Both were very good and very filling. Two people could have easily shared one full plate. Another thought I have always had about the Jewish population is that they were very reserved, almost to the point of unfriendly. This was disproven, however, I do realize they were selling their product but after all, they did open their facility to tours, something that was not necessary to have the fair. The tour was given by their Rabbi, who explained some of the Jewish beliefs and answered as many questions as time permitted. We were allowed to see the Torah, their chapel and their sanctuary. The Rabbi invited each one to “Jewish classes” he will hold in the Fall and made everyone feel comfortable. The foods servers were extremely friendly and hostesses were about checking to make sure nothing was needed. I was pleased to see several ethnic groups in attendance, including Middle Eastern. I hope to attend the classes in the Fall and continue to dispel the negative stereotypes I have held regarding the Jews.